(I reply to a random craigslist post under the name “J”)
Subject: pretty smile at Safeway – 34
Listing: Saturday evening about 6:00 you were in line in front of me at Safeway with broccoli and pizza and had the prettiest face! We chatted a bit about pizza and then I got a call from my friend canceling our plans for the night.
I wanted so bad to say Hey, how about you and I hang out but didn’t 🙁 Then as I walked to my car you drove by in your saturn (red I think) maybe blue, and smiled at me again.
I cant stop thinking about you, your eyes, your smile… you are so friggin sexy!
Lets hook up? Email me 🙂
Hi.
Yeah. I remember you. Weird.
-J
P.S. The pizza was delightful by the way.
Wow, how weird is that! This is the first posting I’ve ever put in missed connections and you read it!!!
So would that have been odd if I had said Hey lets go eat and have drinks! Would you have joined me? Apparently pizza might be a good bribe 🙂
How old are you, do you live in west oly as well?
write back
No. I won’t have gone. I had pizza to eat. LOL
-J
nice! lol… hmm, well maybe someday when you dont have pizza or wine we could bump into eachother somewhere again?
any ideas? what do you like? besides, well pizza 😉
I’d rather not bump into you (or any one) because I might drop my stuff.
-J
But if your stuff consisted of 318 superballs it could be quite fun…
Don’t be silly. There is no way I could hold 318 superballs. What would I be doing with 318 superballs anyway? That makes no sense.
unless of coarse we threaded them together like popcorn strings for christmas trees and made a bouncy scarf thing or one piece bikini for you!
I’d look pretty damn silly in a bikini! My junk would fall out.
Want to meet this weekend? That is, only if you promise to wear that mini skirt you were wearing the other night.
-J
YOUR JUNK? i wasnt wearing a miniskirt. im a guy!
Oh. Wow. Awkward.
That must have been two different people who ran into each other in Safeway.
In any case, how do you look in a miniskirt? Are we still on for this weekend?
FUCK OFF!
I’ll buy some superballs.
FUCK YOU DICK!!!!!
Leave a Reply